MY BRIEF TESTIMONY

BRIEF 5 min. PERSONAL TESTIMONY - BARRY BALLARD

On a warm summer day in Washington D.C., I sat in a small movie theater listening to a re-broadcast of a Billy graham crusade that had been previously given elsewhere. I was attending with a Christian group who ministered on the air force based where I was stationed, "Andrews Air Force Base". At the conclusion of the presentation, there was an invitation given to receive Christ and counselors were standing up front to pray with those who came forward. The house lights went up and I went forward and prayed to receive Jesus Christ into my life. This was not the moment of my true conversion, this was "preparation-of-heart", part one.

On a humid pitch-black night in 1969, my plane touched down on the Saigon airfield that was currently under rocket attack. Black-out conditions were in effect and we were rushed to trucks and then transported to our barracks and its inclusive bunker for protection. I was assigned an m16 rifle, two clips of ammo, and given a helmet and flack-vest. I spent my first night in Saigon standing in the bunker, wondering "why?" I was even here. I understood none of it, except that supposedly it had to do with communism and we were protecting democracy. But, I just felt abandoned to the most bizarre and remote assignment I could imagine. I worked "support", so I do not want to give the false impression that I was "combat"; but I did serve some time in the jungle. Only one man died in our group during the year I was there; and he told me beforehand that he wanted to die and never return home. He had received his divorce papers in the mail about a week before my arrival. He was shot down in a helicopter "one" day before he was to return home. My one year in Saigon was a lesson in the deterioration of the human spirit and soul. Eventually, I also learned to hate myself and "living" and could care less about what might lie ahead. I was returning to the states with a crushed human soul, devoid of all optimism. This was "preparation-of-heart", part two.

On a humid gray-dusk-like-evening, I found myself, in 1970, driving through the main gate of Carswell Air Force Base in Fort Worth, Texas. I soon settled into my tasks of working in the 7th bomb wing headquarters, in support roles again as usual. I also served on the honor guard for special occasions for fallen veterans funerals, or award ceremonies. Even though my personal psyche was "wasted“; I was considered an admirable employee and respected for my abilities. My inner life however was an absolute disaster that I did not "share" with anyone. Strangely enough; I was visited by representatives of the "Navigators"; the same Christian organization that had approached me in Washington D.C. I began attending bible studies two nights a week and felt a little better about life by receiving this follow-up. I'll call this "preparation-of-heart", part three.

During my term of service at Carswell, I met my wife to be, Beverly, who invited me to her church in River Oaks, "Trinity Baptist Church". They had a young pastor, John Hatch, who was just finishing his doctorate at Southwestern and the atmosphere attracted me. It was in 1973, “4” years after that initial "preparation-of-heart"; that I made an honest commitment to Jesus Christ and immediately followed that with baptism.

From there, the road did not get any smoother, but my “soul” began a healing process that eventually went from healing to true "Wonder and Discovery". The first thing that was revealed to me was my spiritual gift, which is "Teaching". While at Trinity, I ended up writing three commentaries: James, Colossians, and Philippians. All three helped me grow in my commitment to Jesus Christ.

True conversion was preceded by three moments of "preparation-of-the-heart" in my case. Over a four year stretch of time, God never gave up on me. I think the strength of my testimony must be given to the strength of God's loving patience; to lead me along the final path that would secure my faith. Thank You.
















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lectures on jurgen moltmann

mp3's

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

CONSCIENCE : ITS STRUCTURE

MOYAR GIVES US A DETAILED PICTURE OF CONSCIENCE , including the contribution of the unconscious.  2011 pub. date

http://www.mediafire.com/?2fzmvn6bdg977iz

click on:  DIRECT LINK to access

Monday, December 17, 2012

INTELLIGENCE TRIAD CHART

CLICK ON:  DIRECT LINK TO ACCESS

http://www.mediafire.com/view/?h8z85jx3arp2jid

INTELLIGENCE BUILDS INCARNATION- MODEL

FOR MOLTMANN; his heart holds the Bonhoeffer doctrine of incarnation and his mind holds the Hegel doctrine of god’s sovereignty. Therefore, intelligence builds our model of the process of incarnation in history. Hegel’s doctrine of intelligence directly applies to Moltmann. This presentation is the best currently available to any readership. PLEASE DOWNLOAD the chart first.

http://www.mediafire.com/?94sm5ilwj99x50r

click on :  DIRECT LINK to access

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

THE ABYSS TEMPLATE

Mills drew us the absolute best picture of the unconscious .  nothing compares.  it offers a visual entrance-point into hegel's psychology.  notice the transitions from EXPANSION to BIFURCATION to POLARIZATION. 

click on :  DIRECT LINK to access

http://www.mediafire.com/view/?7pt01c8yb6n2h9a

Sunday, December 9, 2012

THE LIVING MIND TEMPLATE

HERE'S  the triad flo-chart I did not give you earlier to Winfield's living mind.  triad format to accompany the living mind lecture:

click on :  DIRECT LINK to access

http://www.mediafire.com/view/?l5bfvq2atirw55y

Saturday, December 8, 2012

NIGHT-LIKE ABYSS OF THE UNCONSCIOUS

Mills gives us a presentation of the unconscious as slumbering and emerging. from 2002 and still the best overall analysis. 

click on :  DIRECT LINK to access.  30 min.

http://www.mediafire.com/?hhi2tj5pxim4hhd

Saturday, December 1, 2012

HEGEL'S PHILOSOPHY OF PSYCHOLOGY

WINFIELD'S  PRESENTATION IN "THE LIVING MIND"   30 MIN.
each transition includes:  NEGATION - PRESERVATION - TRANSCENDENCE
as Hegel intended.  2011 pub. date

click on:  DIRECT LINKto acess.

http://www.mediafire.com/?jvvvecwbb9r2wtv