MY BRIEF TESTIMONY

BRIEF 5 min. PERSONAL TESTIMONY - BARRY BALLARD

On a warm summer day in Washington D.C., I sat in a small movie theater listening to a re-broadcast of a Billy graham crusade that had been previously given elsewhere. I was attending with a Christian group who ministered on the air force based where I was stationed, "Andrews Air Force Base". At the conclusion of the presentation, there was an invitation given to receive Christ and counselors were standing up front to pray with those who came forward. The house lights went up and I went forward and prayed to receive Jesus Christ into my life. This was not the moment of my true conversion, this was "preparation-of-heart", part one.

On a humid pitch-black night in 1969, my plane touched down on the Saigon airfield that was currently under rocket attack. Black-out conditions were in effect and we were rushed to trucks and then transported to our barracks and its inclusive bunker for protection. I was assigned an m16 rifle, two clips of ammo, and given a helmet and flack-vest. I spent my first night in Saigon standing in the bunker, wondering "why?" I was even here. I understood none of it, except that supposedly it had to do with communism and we were protecting democracy. But, I just felt abandoned to the most bizarre and remote assignment I could imagine. I worked "support", so I do not want to give the false impression that I was "combat"; but I did serve some time in the jungle. Only one man died in our group during the year I was there; and he told me beforehand that he wanted to die and never return home. He had received his divorce papers in the mail about a week before my arrival. He was shot down in a helicopter "one" day before he was to return home. My one year in Saigon was a lesson in the deterioration of the human spirit and soul. Eventually, I also learned to hate myself and "living" and could care less about what might lie ahead. I was returning to the states with a crushed human soul, devoid of all optimism. This was "preparation-of-heart", part two.

On a humid gray-dusk-like-evening, I found myself, in 1970, driving through the main gate of Carswell Air Force Base in Fort Worth, Texas. I soon settled into my tasks of working in the 7th bomb wing headquarters, in support roles again as usual. I also served on the honor guard for special occasions for fallen veterans funerals, or award ceremonies. Even though my personal psyche was "wasted“; I was considered an admirable employee and respected for my abilities. My inner life however was an absolute disaster that I did not "share" with anyone. Strangely enough; I was visited by representatives of the "Navigators"; the same Christian organization that had approached me in Washington D.C. I began attending bible studies two nights a week and felt a little better about life by receiving this follow-up. I'll call this "preparation-of-heart", part three.

During my term of service at Carswell, I met my wife to be, Beverly, who invited me to her church in River Oaks, "Trinity Baptist Church". They had a young pastor, John Hatch, who was just finishing his doctorate at Southwestern and the atmosphere attracted me. It was in 1973, “4” years after that initial "preparation-of-heart"; that I made an honest commitment to Jesus Christ and immediately followed that with baptism.

From there, the road did not get any smoother, but my “soul” began a healing process that eventually went from healing to true "Wonder and Discovery". The first thing that was revealed to me was my spiritual gift, which is "Teaching". While at Trinity, I ended up writing three commentaries: James, Colossians, and Philippians. All three helped me grow in my commitment to Jesus Christ.

True conversion was preceded by three moments of "preparation-of-the-heart" in my case. Over a four year stretch of time, God never gave up on me. I think the strength of my testimony must be given to the strength of God's loving patience; to lead me along the final path that would secure my faith. Thank You.

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lectures on jurgen moltmann

mp3's

Monday, August 16, 2010

moltmann's pneumatology

moltmann's pneumatology from history and the triune god.
the process of unification.


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=97ULJNIG

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

moltmann on science

moltmann's book "science and wisdom", actual new material from moltmann.
he is all-hegel here.

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=74DQ1KXU

Friday, July 30, 2010

roger haight christology

lecture three, four, and five for:
JESUS - SYMBOL OF GOD

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=OCJZ5CD0

Thursday, July 29, 2010

roger haight christology

lecture number one and two for:
JESUS - SYMBOL OF GOD
roger haight
year 2000 "theology book of the year"

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=541JSBGD

Monday, July 19, 2010

tillich - lecture number six

paul tillich on healing of human ambiguity


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=F66DTR5W

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

karl barth 101

general outline of karl barth's theology

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=TPC67BN3

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

niebuhr 101

richard niebuhr's "the responsible self"

a linguistic approach to ethics

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=DWAQROTP

Monday, June 21, 2010

lecture 37 on moltmann

christopher morse's linguistic analysis of moltmann - 1979


http://hulkshare.com/8tt9zub9j85o

Sunday, June 20, 2010

lecture 36 on moltmann

moltmann's book, "the crucified god" and universal salvation


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=T7F5PBNK

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

bertrand russell 01

bertrand russell's "problems of philosophy"


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=SIZC3M0P

Thursday, May 27, 2010

wittgenstein 03

the tractatus explained

7 essential steps toward the formation of a picture

http://hulkshare.com/twelnytq42im

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

paul ricoeur 03

ontological grammar evolves to historical god of promise


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=13MBLDF3

Sunday, May 16, 2010

paul ricoeur 02

the linguistic network term "wrath of god" and

the ontological grammer of "retribution"


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=BINSMMD0

Friday, May 14, 2010

paul ricoeur

intro to methodology of ricoeur's linguistic analysis in his book
" the symbolism of evil"


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=3MM2FWD6 (brief 20 min intro)

Friday, May 7, 2010

st. augustine

an answer for evolution before darwin ever appeared


"rationes seminales"

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=3HRW1J5D

Monday, May 3, 2010

hegel 101

in-depth discussion of hegel. 40 minutes


http://hulkshare.com/69nqnia73kzm

Friday, April 30, 2010

wittgenstein

30 min outline of wittgenstein's linguistic philosophy

http://hulkshare.com/tqrn3ds4o8pu

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

kierkegaard

welcome to kierkegaard 101


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=RK04F8WP

Saturday, April 24, 2010

plato

welcome to plato 101


http://hulkshare.com/8q1ucsrm9err

Monday, April 19, 2010

henri bergson

epistemology of henri bergson


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=PAX8VVA0

Thursday, April 15, 2010

aristotle

30 minute outline of aristotle


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=WISH3DTB

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

benedict de spinoza

the methodology of benedict de spinoza
the first section of his ethics


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=E3QZW58D

Monday, April 5, 2010

kant and the possibility of an ontology

kant's transcendental dialectic and the formation of universals and epistemology and an ontology


http://http://www.megaupload.com/?d=CBXUOPIV

Saturday, April 3, 2010

immanual kant outline

outline of kant's philosophy


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=VDS87335

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

lecture 35b on moltmann

small 1974 paperback, entitled "man",published prior to "crucified god"


http://hulkshare.com/emmnyagkjoar

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

lecture 35a on jurgen moltmann

all moltmann lectures reduced to a 30 minute overall summary. good for a reference point (then go through lectures 1- 30)

http://hulkshare.com/3pbro4ngsjlz

Monday, March 8, 2010

lecture on george santayana

critical realism against german idealism


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=HVR7QOOK

Thursday, March 4, 2010

lecture on john elof boodin

another American responds to hegel.


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=T8BXWRCM

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

lecture 34 on moltmann

A, N, WHITEHEAD discusses the function of Reason in 1929 essay.

another American response to hegel

http://hulkshare.com/v4jxh15qdnml

Monday, March 1, 2010

lecture 33 on moltmann

E, S, BRIGHTMAN
my stepping-stone to moltmann


http://hulkshare.com/ia1bmunx6djw

Thursday, February 25, 2010

lecture 32 on moltmann

contributions from aristotle and spinoza


http://hulkshare.com/oaip9v85uv1b

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

lecture 31 on moltmann

additional content on hegel


http://hulkshare.com/uvqt7qhlpzri

Saturday, February 13, 2010

lecture 30 on moltmann

summary of the realm of the spirit


http://hulkshare.com/kpujx5rnt21l

Friday, February 12, 2010

lecture 29 on moltmann

moltmann corrects mis-interpretations of hope in important 1968 essay. should be listened to, prior to lecture 1


http://hulkshare.com/xirh46mgcgcx

Thursday, February 11, 2010

lecture 28 on moltmann

additional content on ecclesiology from 1979 essay; written two years after his book on the church


http://hulkshare.com/7c262cyc1h5g

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

lecture 27 on moltmann

moltmann explains "tendency" in excellent 1968 essay


http://hulkshare.com/g13h99npl2dr

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

lecture 26 on moltmann

kant's influence on moltmann

http://hulkshare.com/tay2i3z1hlys

Monday, February 8, 2010

lecture 25 on moltmann

the influence of hegel

http://hulkshare.com/w6wlv4fntv9u

Friday, February 5, 2010

lecture 24 on moltmann

1979 essay on theology of the cross


http://hulkshare.com/r9um7wk22c21

Thursday, February 4, 2010

lecture 23 on moltmann

theology of mysticism essay


http://hulkshare.com/8y4uavu2hqoi

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

lecture 22 on moltmann

http://hulkshare.com/5bg8xm6b6t8t


concise presentation of trinitarian ontology

Monday, February 1, 2010

lecture 21 on moltmann

the idea of freedom and liberation theology

http://hulkshare.com/rj1t8xopf0pn

Saturday, January 30, 2010

lecture 20 revised

moltmann's ecclesiology

http://hulkshare.com/w4dfrc5pn8mk

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

lecture 19 on moltmann

systematic theology and "meditation" And unanswered prayer!!!!!!!!


http://hulkshare.com/ammph4sr6dhx

lecture 18 on moltmann

liberty and planning

http://hulkshare.com/tc2vk7d7jun3

lecture 17 on moltmann

the term "father"

http://hulkshare.com/l8apywcsrqul

lecture 16 on moltmann

"divine healing" - possible??

http://hulkshare.com/b8oai038q3v0

lecture 15 on moltmann

idea of "verification"

http://hulkshare.com/lzyedch1yln7

lecture 14 on moltmann

doctrine of the spirit

http://hulkshare.com/ih6odpdpgdni

lecture 13 on moltmann

doctrine of the trinity

http://hulkshare.com/p90gwifir0nw

lecture 12 on moltmann

"oughtness"

http://hulkshare.com/9pzsbn17dzyy

lecture 11 on moltmann

the idea of "final judgment"

http://hulkshare.com/usfosei0goso

lecture 10 on moltmann

the idea of "work"

http://hulkshare.com/aihu7hz6sxzf

lecture 9 on moltmann

creation and the concept of time

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=1ZNNXDPU

lecture 8 on moltmann

doctrine of creation

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=Y1A5PXIO

lecture 7 on moltmann

contributions of creative arts for theology

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=HINCABA8

lecture 6 on moltmann

http://hulkshare.com/xmbrlzmzkbh2

lecture 5 on moltmann

on fulfillment

http://hulkshare.com/piid4dfjoe5u

lecture 4 on moltmann

his christology

http://hulkshare.com/vsw2artzyv4s

lecture 3 on moltmann

philosophy of history

http://hulkshare.com/xexzujpe8h27

lecture 2 on moltmann

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=2HMR0TK2

lecture 1 on moltmann

http://hulkshare.com/sag3c242mtsr